The Ebonic Muse

Law School Blues...

2009-12-28T01:35:00.002-05:00

Alive and well with plans to return soon... :-)

"Good Hair"

2009-08-04T21:51:00.001-04:00

Can't wait to see this one...

R.I.P. Naomi Sims: Black is still Beautiful

2009-08-04T16:43:00.002-04:00

America's First Black Supermodel died today after battling with cancer. She became symbolic during the late 60s and 70s as the "Black is Beautiful" campaign spread throughout the country. She graced the covers of National Magazines such as Cosmopolitan and Life.

May she rest in peace.

Obama at the 100th Anniversary of NAACP

2009-07-17T17:57:00.002-04:00

My favorite part was the end when he quoted the Negro National Anthem.

Happy Friday Everyone!

Sotomayor

2009-07-16T15:23:00.003-04:00

Patiently waiting for the updated U.S. Supreme Court photo. :-)

To all Dreamers...

2009-07-12T18:43:00.005-04:00

For the past few weeks, I struggled with a decision whether or not to pursue something that is very important to me. My ultimate dream as a professional, is to attend law school and one day advocate for women and children in family courts and public policy. I have been blessed with the opportunity to attend law school this Fall, despite many odds. Yet, until this past week, I was not sure that I was ready for a number of reasons. However, today, I decided that I will step out on faith and pursue my dreams.

Therefore, I am posting these quotes to encourage the dreamers:

"Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world." --Harriet Tubman

"No one should negotiate their dreams. Dreams must be free to flee and fly high. No government, no legislature, has a right to limit your dreams. You should never agree to surrender your dreams." --Jesse Jackson

"All our dreams can come true - if we have the courage to pursue them." --Walt Disney

"A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song." --Maya Angelou

"Hold fast to your dreams, for without them life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly. " --Langston Hughes

"So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable."--Christopher Reeve

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”
Eleanor Roosevelt

" I will! I am! I can! I will actualize my dream. I will press ahead. I will settle down and see it through. I will solve the problems. I will pay the price. I will never walk away from my dream until I see my dream walk away: Alert! Alive! Achieved!" --Robert Schuller

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've always imagined." --Henry David Thoreau

And my all-time favorite:

"Pray that God will not let you miss your destiny. Ask him not to let you hope for things that are not part of his plan for you life. Listen to his voice and attune your heart to his spirit so that when he speaks you will know it and know what you must do to see your own dream being birthed into being." --T.D. Jakes

Sweet Dreams...Love it! Love it! Love it!

2009-07-09T19:11:00.003-04:00

Beyoncé - New Music - More Music Videos

This video is amazing! She has totally redeemed herself from the last two videos. Enjoy!

Hotlanta = Reality Show Haven

2009-06-30T13:52:00.005-04:00

The Atlanta Reality TV drama is about to begin! Tonight, BET will premiere Tiny & Toya, another reality show about women living the glamours life. While Toya and Lil'Wayne are no longer married, it will be interesting to see what type of life she will choose to portray on the show.

This show is just one of a few that will feature women of color in the Atlanta area. Keyshia Cole's family will be back on the screen as well, but without Ms. Cole. Apparently, Nefie and Frankie will have their own show on BET. Also, who could forget those fabulous "Housewives of Atlanta?" Their season 2 premieres on July 30, 2009.

This season there is a new housewife, Kandi from the 90s R&B group Xscape. Kandi is more of a celebrity than the other women because she was a part of a successful group and continues to write songs.

And if all that was not enough, Rozonda “Chilli” Thomas will have her own show on VH1. According to several sites, Chilli will be searching for love with the help of relationship expert Tionna Smalls. Let's just pray this is not another I Love New York, For the Love of Ray J type of show. I will give all the shows the benefit of the doubt, but it will be interesting to watch Tiny & Toya's premiere tonight.

I am happy to see more women of color with their own television shows, but why must they all be "reality" based or court judges? Can we see more shows like "Hawthorne?"

Oh and do not forget about Mo'Nique's new talk show on BET. This should be interesting. BET has not featured women in a talk show format since Oh Drama! I hope this show is produced a bit better and without the shouting matches.

Truth be told, I am happy for all of them. We are making progress. Its unfortunate that drama has to take place in order for Black Women to get air time, but hopefully this is just the beginning and we will strive towards excellence and continously pushing the limits. I would really like to see shows that break the stereotypes and challenge preconceived notions about who we women of color really are...

Peace.

Sisters and Love

2009-06-29T22:35:00.004-04:00

For the past two months or so, I've spent a lot of time thinking about what love is and what it is not. And I admit that there is no definition of love greater than the description described in the Holy Bible.

1 Corinthians 13

Love

1If I speak in the tongues[a] of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,[b] but have not love, I gain nothing. 4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

This description requires believers to not only love God, but also love others and show love by interacting in a particular manner with others. When we interact in love with one another, we also want the best for each other and encourage one another. We show respect and consideration for one another...

While interacting on all the various social network sites, I have become increasingly aware of how much we women criticize one another. From giving our opinion on fashion and hair of celebrities to down right attacking another woman's character, far too many women are left without a support system of sisters. How often do you hear women say that they do not socialize with women, and would prefer to hang around men? Do you remember the reasons why they claim to only socialize with men? How much of it is true?

On top of all that, there are many images in the media and certain groups of men that continously attack a woman's self-esteem/body image and refuse to show respect. I think respect is love. For example, one song on heavy rotation on R&B/Pop stations is, "Every Girl" Lil Wayne feat Young Money. Have you sat down and listened to the words? I was so disgusted while watching the BET Awards last night, especially this performance because they had to censor so many words--not to mention what the song is about.

I just think that we can do better...and it starts with us, women. We have to love ourselves enough to know what types of things we are exposing ourselves to, whether its junk food or dirty and disrespectful rap lyrics. All of these things are important and have a great influence on the beings that evolve into...

I just had to say something.

R.I.P. Michael Jackson

2009-06-25T18:46:00.001-04:00

Men, Women, & the Shop

2009-06-12T18:40:00.003-04:00

Men, Women, & the Barbershop--a great combination.

Today, I vibed with barbers at my stylist's new salon in Atlanta. It was a typical barbershop-type visit but its been so long since I visited a salon that had male stylist/barbers that I forgot how much fun people have with those conversations! You know what conversations Im speaking of...issues between Men and Women in relationships, commitment/marriage, prenuptial agreements, celebrity marriages, etc.

Anyway, apparently the entire shop is passing around Steve Harvey's book "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man." And for some odd reason, I could not help but ask this brother if I can take of picture of him while he reads. He had a lot of deep things to say and of course you know I put in my two cents. But I was listening too.

And for the first time in a long time, I think brothers are paying attention...well some of them.

Happy for Kelly!

2009-06-08T23:00:00.001-04:00

Kelly Rowland is free!

Free from Columbia Records and Matthew Knowles.

I'm not sure what this means for her career, but I'm all about fresh starts.

I actually like this song & video.

I'm happy for you Kelly! You are finally "Doing you!" :-)

Wacky Oprah?

2009-06-07T22:17:00.002-04:00

Apparently, last week's Newsweek's cover story entitled, "Crazy Talk: Oprah, Wacky Cures & You" prompted the talk show Queen to respond. As you may recall from the news stories, the weekly magazine challenged the advice given by some of Oprah's guest and tried to hold her responsible for their medical advice. Now I'm sure the show broadcasts some sort of disclaimer during the viewing, but the magazine decided to make the discussions a matter of national news.

Accordingly to Yahoo! News, the article praises Winfrey's health and fitness experts Dr. Mehmet Oz and trainer Bob Green, it's particularly critical of such celebrity guests as Suzanne Somers and Jenny McCarthy, who advocated taking 60 daily supplements and avoiding vaccinations out of fear that they cause autism, respectively.

Here is Oprah's response: "For 23 years, my show has presented thousands of topics that reflect the human experience, including doctors' medical advice and personal health stories that have prompted conversations between our audience members and their health care providers," Winfrey said in a statement. "I trust the viewers, and I know that they are smart and discerning enough to seek out medical opinions to determine what may be best for them."

Why do they want to bother the Queen? Are there not more important things to talk about? This just seemed completely random!

The Ecstatic!

2009-06-06T19:50:00.002-04:00

Just a little clip from Black Dante.

I cannot wait to raid iTunes on Tuesday for Black Dante aka Mos Def's new album. I heard the previews and so far I'm in love with "Priority." The whole album promises to be solid. Can't wait....

Another Phenomenal Woman...

2009-06-03T22:19:00.003-04:00

Here is an update on one of my favorite actresses Phylicia Rashad. She play a leading role in "August: Osage County" at the Music Box Theater. Apparently, Mrs. Rashad plays a mother to a white family AND she is a drug abuser. This is definitely something a little different, but I'm sure she will be incredible.

Was she not the DIVA Mom in The Cosby Show? Here is my FAVORITE "Clair Huxtable" Scene: "The Wrethched"

The Princess and the Frog

2009-06-01T09:17:00.002-04:00

The New York Times recently published an article about the upcoming Disney Film, The Princess and the Frog. Apparently the discussions over the Afrocentricity of this Disney character have already began. We all knew that it would be a matter of time before Disney created a Black Princess, and we also knew the uproar and debate it would cause. This situation is no different than Pocahontas.

Some of the main problems people mention include skin tone, the fact that the Prince is a Frog, and the setting being in New Orleans. We all know that colorism is a problem in African American neighborhoods. I think that no matter what shade the princess turned out to be, someone would find fault with it. If she had darker skin, perhaps people would think they were making the Princess look like the infamous "pickaninny" carcicatures. If she had more fair skin, others would talk about the media's preference for portraying African Americans in lighter skin. This can go on...not to mention the sexist themes throughout all of the Disney films.

At the end of the day, Disney will never be able to please everyone. I look forward to taking my sister to see The Princess and the Frog. This movie is another "teachable moment" for families to have with their children. Its a discussion parents have the option to lead; but for me, its a discussion that will be required.

Girls, Barbies, Harlem

2009-05-29T11:29:00.003-04:00

The title of this picture is "Girls, Barbies, Harlem" from 1970.

When I first saw it online at the New York Times, I went from feeling nostalgic to disgust. What are you thinking?

Mean Girls

2009-05-24T16:32:00.002-04:00

Although I loved the "Mean Girls" movie, its sad to know that this situation is starting to hit elementary and middle school kids harder. What happened to the days of playing the dozens?

Apparently, Mean Girls are getting younger and seriously dangerous. Watch the video below from CNN. This is just too incredibly sad.

Please visit the Government's website: http://www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/kids/
for more info on tips for bullying.

I wonder what happens to those children whose parents are simply too "busy" to ask their kids how their day at school went? Or better yet, what happens to those children who "act out" at school and parents never get to the bottom of their problems because they are single parents or working two jobs, etc.

The Rehearsal

2009-05-17T22:41:00.002-04:00

My cousins and I recently called ourselves having an indoor "Ladies Night." Getting all six of us together on the same weekend is tough! We are all twenty-somethings and have our own lives to work out. However, on rare occassions we have opportunities for nights like this particular night. Just as when we were teenagers, the topic of our discussions surrounded men and women in relationships.

My eldest cousin in the house got pretty furious during our discussion. She said she is tired of "the rehearsal." She went on to equate relationships to any sport or hobby. She talked about the struggles of sharpening technique, building skills and finding the "right" players for the team. I began thinking about all the time women invest into their "crafts," which can vary with each woman. Some of us spend time preparing by getting our careers, finances, spiritual well being, etc together. While others want to make sure they know how to hold down the homefront with cooking and running a household. No matter your position, women of color in their 20s are usually preparing and not getting married or into really serious relationships until late 20s/early 30s. With all that said, it can be exhausting to put so much effort into the rehearsal. We spend so much time preparing for the big dance or the big show, and we forget to dance!

When she shared her perspective, I thought about the movie "Center Stage" and the ballerina lifestyle. I cannot even begin to imagine all the time, money, and patience put into building their talent. The shoes, the scuffed up toes, issues with weight, the classes, expectations,performance mistakes and anxiety, and the really "important" recitals. All of these things are expected and its no different for relationships. Everyone is waiting for the main event also known as the wedding. But people rarely think about what happens after the show or the wedding. Some women just want the title: Principal Ballerina. Wife.

Its exhausting. I finally told her...just dance.

If you focus on your dance, the magnitude of the event or who will or will not be there will not matter. Why? Because if you've done what you were supposed to do, the "right" player will not be able to take his eyes off of you. Your presence, style, technique, and talent would be hard to miss.

And if you are passed over, it was not meant for you. NEXT!

Idiocracy Looks Backwards

2009-05-16T00:22:00.002-04:00

While at work today I stumbled into one of the most ridiculous conversations I have ever had the unfortunate experience of witnessing. First let me say that, I can understand why someone might not be happy that Obama is president or someone may have chosen not to vote for him last November. All ignorant reasons aside (racism, bigotry, etc) perhaps they are a die hard republican, they don't agree with his views, or they just felt the other guy would do a better job. Regardless of my point of view on the matter, all of these points are valid matters of opinion. After all, you can't know what the future holds. Being weary of the future is one thing, but wanting to go back is a completely different issue.

In this ghastly conversation someone actually said that they longed for the days of Bush? Bush! As in George W. Bush himself. The man, the confusion, the awesome SNL tag lines. I was so dumbfounded I actually asked the individual to repeat himself just to make sure my ears were not playing tricks on me He did and I stood there. It felt like time stood still as he regaled us with his backwards logic. There was talk about Bush caring more about our economy and doing more to fix our foreign relations issues. There was also mention of Bush coming to Africa's rescue and during the Bush administration gas prices were lower. I have never been in so much shock about anything in all of my days.

How, pray tell, does this even come out of someones mouth? That is like longing for leg warmers, acid wash jeans, and that perm you got in 1984 to return after wearing tall boots, boot cut jeans, and a layered bob- you've already seen it in retrospect so you know it's a bad idea. If I even thought it, I would be afraid of saying it if only because my stupidity could show a clear lack of judgement and lead to a whole host of problems.

A Brief Introduction

2009-05-12T23:53:00.003-04:00

I've known Ms Blake for the better part of a decade. I've always found her poised, but frank nature refreshing and even when we've disagreed I have always appreciated her insight. The Ebonic Muse is a great way to spread thoughts and opinions (popular and unpopular). I am happy to be a part of it.

I'm not going to bore you or give away all of my secrets by giving a biological rundown of my life. You know: age, race, height, favorite color, favorite food, sexual orientation, education, etc. You'll get to know more about me as I participate in this blog. What I can say is that you can expect me to offer a wide range of opinions from logical to borderline crazy and most definitely devil's advocate (I like to stir the pot). I believe in the free exchange of ideas and less about who's right and who's wrong. I'm also pretty sarcastic and that's hard to express in writing so I am going to make one blanket apology now in case my humor offends someone in an unintended way.

Let's have some fun!!

XOXO
~Nai

Keisha and Kaseem

2009-04-21T07:16:00.002-04:00

So I heard through the Grapevine that Keisha Knight Pulliam has a new reality show debuting on Oxygen called "Keisha and Kaseem. I have to stay on top of any updates.

Mighty Michelle: Holding it Down as Usual

2009-04-06T18:38:00.001-04:00

Revelations on Black Manhood & Love

2009-04-01T19:11:00.007-04:00

What is Black Manhood?

Unfortunately, I managed to make it to age 25 and still not understand it completely.

All that I know about Black Manhood is that its tough--but so is Black Womanhood.

What do you get when you mix Black Men & Love?

In a recent conversation with another close friend of mine, we talked about our experience with our fathers and its impact on relationships we have with men--platonic or romantic. The conversation was somber towards the end because we had so many unanswered questions and left the phone line reflecting on our own experiences with Black Manhood.

One of the most profound illustrations of Black Manhood was described to me in Steve Harvey's book, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. Somehow, this brother was able to break down the essence of being a man in a way that I actually understood. In Steve Harvey's book, there is an entire chapter where Harvey explains how men show love towards women in ways that women may or may not be fully aware. He spends a whole chapter describing three things that men will do if he is really into you and wants to show that he loves you.

1. Profess: meaning that a man goes out of his way to make sure every man in the room knows you're his woman and not "just a friend" or not just " (insert name here)."

2. Provide: bringing home the bacon to provide for the family. He talks a LOT about bills and their priorities. You have to pick up the book yourself to get all he has to share on this one.

3. Protect: self-explanatory. A "good" man can recognize you for the strong independent woman that you are but he feels its necessary for him to be able to protect the woman and family that he loves. So, while he understands that you are a strong Black woman, taking out the trash, carrying the groceries, and mowing the law are things young black men were taught to do at an early age to prepare them for providing and protecting their woman in manhood. NOTE: This is a totally different conversation but I will keep it moving.

Later in the book, Harvey mentioned that in return, Black men only need 3 things: loyalty, support, and "the cookie." With these six ideas, we learn that once "good" Black men know what they want and believe to have found it, they will do what is necessary to keep it. Now there is a lot of work to get all of these pieces to fit together, but the basics are there.

On top of reading Harvey's book, I happened to be working with a client recently who was seeking counseling primarily due to the bruising of his dignity and pride in his ability to maintain a certain definition of manhood.

This client broke down the significance of how it feels to be a man and provide for a family. He talked about the importance of being able to connect with the woman he married. He explained that he promised her father that he would do whatever necessary to take care of her when he asked permission to marry her. For various reasons, he felt he had let both her and her father down. He was hurt. While I cannot explain the nature of this client's predicament, please believe that whatever happened to this person was sincerely not a situation he created.

Now for all the people who really know me understand that I can be a bag of water at times....this was one of those times...but I held it down.

I was really moved because for the first time in a long time, I witnessed the true love of a Black man. I felt the tension and emotion in his voice. This man had to humble himself and ask for help. He was a man that did not believe in going to see "therapists." He always takes everything to GOD. However, this "situation" was one that brought him to a place he had never been before and it scared him.

The fact that he was not only physically distant from the love of his life and they were having issues was enough to deal with; but he was seriously hurting because he felt that he failed to be the man that he always believed himself to be. He cried--perhaps for the first time.

Thats love...

Its sad that it took me 25 years to witness the power of romantic love within a black man. Whats even more unfortunate is that it did not come from someone I know--a family member. I first felt and understood "real" romantic love of a Black Man from virtually a stranger.

There was so much to his story but I think you get a snippet of the raw emotion coming from this client and the significance of upholding manhood and his love for his family.

The picture in this post is my favorite picture of Barack Obama. My interpretation of this picture could go on forever. Yet, the words that come to mind is Black Manhood. I see love in that picture.

If only we can see brothers love on each other like this everyday....

If only we could see Black men love Black women as my client loves his wife and respects her family.

If only black men could begin to love themselves and seek God in everything they do...we all would have a more firm understanding of Black Manhood.

Women & Labels

2009-03-27T10:13:00.008-04:00

Women love Labels.

We want to know the quality of the item we were seeking. We believe that if we at least know the name on the label, we are able to determine if the item is worth purchasing, sacrificing, and tailoring. If only we knew the label, we could make decisions on when and where to wear this item. The material, the fit, the color, and your feel in the item matters, but if the label is not suitable for your tastes some women shy away at even bringing the item along to certain events. Women love labels because the labels give women a since of how significant the item can appear to not only themselves, but society at large.

Unfortunately, we sometimes get so caught up in labels that we disregard how precious an item can be and ignore how it may compliment our features. Why shy away at a Payless pump if the color goes perfect with your gown and they feel great on your feet? Should we not just enjoy the time we have with the shoe and Thank the Lord they do not hurt our feet while out with friends? Far too often, we mistake labels with superiority and we miss the opportunity to just live in the moment. Yes, women love labels---especially when it comes to relationships.

Last night I sat with a close friend who is confused about a relationship with her boyfriend (or whatever label/category she will ultimately decide). We discussed the problems we both share with having to know exactly what our relationships with men mean. She explained that its easier to know what to expect when you have labels. She went on to say how much easier it is to know that you are with someone exclusively and he is with you too. So of course I had to play Devil's Advocate for while. I asked whats in a label? Is it not enough to know that you have a healthy relationship with a great guy? A guy who supports you, prays for you, and wants the best for you? Then we started to discuss, at what point is it really necessary to have a label?

According to Steve Harvey's new book, Act Like A Lady Think Like A man--there are five questions you must ask a man to know where you really stand in a relationship with him. But I will not spoil the book, you have to go buy your own!

I honestly think labels get in the way of building a relationship, but at the same time, it is comforting to know where you stand. This year I have resolved to focus on MsBlake and wholeheartedly believe that all things will come together in due time. Until then...live life and forget the labels....

...At least until my biological clock really starts to tick.

**Sighs**

Women and Labels.

My President...

2009-03-24T23:37:00.002-04:00

Before I call it a night, I had to post a comment on Barack Obama's Press Conference.

CNN's Ed Henry asked Barack Obama why it took him a few days to respond to the AIG Bonus fiasco.

My President said : "It took us a couple of days because I like to know what I'm talking about before I speak."

He said it with a straight face and immediately moved on to the next question. I was initally shocked. Then I laughed. And I finally was like, "Yeah! Obama is no George W. Bush!"

Change has come...

Dumbest Thing I ever Heard!

2009-03-24T12:15:00.005-04:00

A Harvard Professor named, Jeffrey Miron, recently wrote commentary for CNN arguing that Legalizing Drugs will Stop Violence.

In what world?

Although the Professor has some interesting points (e.g., prohibition breeding disrespect for the law but I think this has more to do with institutional discrimination especially targeting specific neighborhoods and groups of people), the majority made me very angry for a number of reasons.

1. Research shows that people in the most distressed situations turn to abusing alcohol and drugs to "ease the pain" of their hardships. The fact the there are a disproportiate number of African-Americans and Latinos enduring hardships leads to an inevitable spike in their abuse of alcohol and drugs. As a professional advocating for change in these types of communities and also as a fellow citizen, legalizing drugs would devastate these communities and add to their ongoing issues that have been present for decades. Do you recall what the boom in crack use did to Black families and neighborhoods in the 80s? Is it not already a problem that there is a liquor store on every street corner in Black neighborhoods. Just image adding hard drugs to the inventory...

2. If all drugs were made legal, we would still need task force to regulate the sale and distribution of these items. A great example of this issue is with alcohol. Colleges across the nation have to continuously deal with underage drinking. Parents are also increasingly unaware of their childrens' behaviors sometimes even at home. Far too often we hear sad stories of teens and young adults dying due to overdosing on drugs; not to mention the alcohol related car accidents that take the lives of innocent commuters. I think this will open up a can of worms!

3. These recreational activities do nothing to help people cope with their real problems. Drugs sugar coats real problems! This includes marijuana (oh I will hear it from some people I know)!

4. Another point, which is one of the most important is the fact that most of the illicit drugs this professor would condone legalizing are deadly. We all know that too much of a good thing is no good at all. Just think about someone who is not familiar at all with drugs and their side effects overdosing.

5. Its an unacceptable argument! Legalizing drugs to stop violence is ridiculous. I would argue that it will only make matters worse and bring drug abuse and crime to another level.

I wonder if this Professor's thinking would be different if he actually grew up in neighborhoods destroyed by drugs. I wonder if this Professor's thinking would be different if he his mother or father were addicted to crack all of his life.

This is another fine example of White Male Privilege.

I am sure I could come up with more reasons or arguements but I just could not wait to write this blog.

This is the dumbest thing I ever heard....

Michelle Obama: She Got It

2009-03-24T09:10:00.005-04:00

She got it! This woman has been holding it down even before Barack Obama announced his run for President. However, since winning the White House, Mrs. Obama has been everywhere! From working directly with military families to visiting area schools, she has made it clear that she wants to stay connected with the American people. This is definitely a good look...

Ok. Back to working on getting those "Michelle Obama" arms...

Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man

2009-03-23T14:11:00.002-04:00

Despite whether or not you listen to the Steve Harvey Morning Show, Steve Harvey's Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man is being read by women of all colors, shapes, and sizes throughout America right now. I attempted to purchase the book the first week it was released and walked away from the bookstore very frustrated. When I finally purchased my copy of the book I could not put it down.

Harvey gives women some very interesting things to think about in his book, but there were definitely portions when I rolled my eyes as he suspected. I urge you to pick up a copy of the book for yourself and consider some of the things he mentions. Steve Harvey not only challenged the "Independent" women to let the man take the lead, but he also suggested that women start to set high standards and requirements of the men we date. He does of these things and more with funny descriptions/stories.

Pick it up! I promise that you will find it entertaining.

Love is Patient

2009-03-22T17:48:00.008-04:00

According to MediaTakeOut.com, T.I.'s fiancee, Tiny, from the 90s R&B Group Xscape shared details of her relationship with Essence Magazine. Here is a excerpt from the article which I feel is amazing.

ESSENCE: What do you think is the biggest misconception people have about you and T.I.'s relationship?

TINY: "That we're not a real couple. They think because we're not married yet and have been engaged for two years that something must be wrong. I know it's a long time, but there are so many restrictions placed upon him now before we can think about planning a wedding. There is so much love between us it's ridiculous, and we like [spending] time together. So the things that people say and write about us doesn't bother me. I know what we have and what he shows me every day and that's all that matters."

ESSENCE: Do you have any words of encouragement for women who might be going through a similar situation as you?

TINY: "Yes. Depending on the situation and the person, you should stick it out through thick and thin—the good and bad times. If you know you're with someone who would give his life for you and is somewhat a responsible better half, then stand up for him. I know my man's heart and because of that I'm going to be everything I need to be for him. Yes, he's made mistakes, but so have I."

"If your man stands up for you and is there whenever you need him, then doesn't he deserve your unconditional love and support? If I know that about my man, then that's the kind of woman I'm going to be for him. I might need him in different ways than he needs me, but if being his woman means loving, supporting and putting his mind at ease, then the least I can do is step up to the plate and be there for him and our family."

Whether or not you believe T.I. continues to get the "milk for free," you have to admit she really loves him and he is blessed to have her. I think she held it DOWN!

Equal Pay!

2009-01-29T15:16:00.002-05:00

Barack Obama signed his first bill today: The Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Restoration Act.

The bill was overturned by the Supreme Court after Lilly Ledbetter, a Goodyear Tire employee, sued for pay discrimination. The only reason they overturned this case was because she filed the lawsuit after the 180th day of receiving her 1st paycheck that had unequal pay. Ridiculous!

Barack Obama said, "It is fitting that with the very first bill I sign … we are upholding one of this nation's first principles: that we are all created equal and each deserve a chance to pursue our own version of happiness."

I love my President, but let us continue to push him into working hard for the American people.

Peace.

Rush

2009-01-27T08:48:00.002-05:00

To say that you want a new President to fail is ridiculous!

This is all the attention he will get from me.

Another Phenomenal Black Woman: Ann Lowe

2009-01-23T14:29:00.003-05:00

With all the controversy over Michelle Obama's dress chosen for the Inaugural Balls, I decided to re-introduce Ann Lowe. Ann Lowe was an African-American Mid-20 thCentury fashionista who designed Jackie Kennedy's dress shown above. Mrs. Kennedy wore this dress on Sept.12, 1953 when she married former President John F. Kennedy.

Ann Lowe received very little recognition for her success. Ann Lowe was a great-grandaughter of a slave and plantation owner. She designed dresses for elite families. It seems Ann Lowe was another Southern woman with city dreams. She enrolled in fashion school during 1917.

Can you imagine a Black woman enrolling in fashion school during 1917? Absolutely amazing and progressive! Perhaps most of her peers were domestic workers or even sharecroppers during that time in Alabama. She is definitely another phenomenal Black woman!

I thought it would be interesting to share this story because a lot of Black women are in conversation over First Lady Michelle Obama's choice not to pick a dress designed by a Black designer. Personally, I thought Mrs. Obama look beautiful regardless.

Sasha & Malia Dolls

2009-01-22T14:24:00.002-05:00

Beanie Babies maker sells Sasha, Malia dolls

The Inauguration

2009-01-15T09:03:00.003-05:00

In case you missed the news around the world, this weekend Americans of all ages, races, gender, sexual orientation, and religion will gather in Washington D.C. to witness the swearing in of Barack Obama as the 44th President of the United States. I will be there!

There are news stories circulating about the absence of Black people at work. There were millions of people like myself who requested PTO/Vacation time months ago.

I am not sure where you will be for the next few days, but I definitely know where you should be on Tuesday January 20, 2009. Find a television, the radio, follow the events on Facebook, or even Myspace---this is an event of a lifetime.

The next time I write to you...my President will be Black. :-)

We Will Survive!

2009-01-09T16:02:00.005-05:00

If you are one of those Americans holding on to your wallet (that should be all of you right now), I would suggest you grap Suze Orman's new book! I am a huge fan of Suze Orman and cannot wait to pick up a copy myself. It just may be the best $10 you spend this year.

Peace

Aging Gracefully

2009-01-05T13:03:00.003-05:00

CNN.com reports the new oldest woman in the world is Gertrude Baines, an African-American woman. She is 114 years old (born in 1894). She recently cast her vote for Barack Obama and spends her time eating/sleeping. She was a House Mom at a State University before retiring.

I love how women of color age gracefully...thank God for melanin and being naturally tanned. :-)

Take care of yourselves Ladies...

Oh and just because you are naturally tanned does not mean you can go without sunscreen. Take care of that beautiful skin!

Peace.

Work

2009-01-02T08:36:00.003-05:00

"People might not get all they work for in this world,

but they must certainly work for all they get." - Frederick Douglass

Happy New Year Everyone!!! I hope you saved a moment to give thanks for being alive in 2009. As we all attempt to start afresh with our goals and plans for the New Year, this note is just a reminder that we all have to work for what we want. No matter how much or little you agree with Douglass' statement, take the momentum you have at this moment to share your goals with a friend. I find that this holds you accountable for not only remembering the goal but actually following through.

Miracles and Blessings.

Shrinking Sistahs

2008-12-31T13:55:00.010-05:00

In case you have missed the news for the past week, African American women are shrinking!

The Center for Disease Control released a study this past week that showed:

"The average height of a black woman born in the 1980s is just under 5 feet 4 inches; her mother, born in the 1960s, is more than half an inch taller. Even her grandmother, born in the 1940s, is a bit taller. The average white woman born in the 1980s is about half an inch taller than her mother. "

The reason why I responded to this new was because the researchers said, "height is a very good overall indicator of how well the human organism thrives in its socioeconomic environment."

So now you have it! All of the adversity African-American manage to overcome on a daily basis does more than burden the soul, cause high blood pressure, and hypertension. All of the problems within the home and community that many African-American women must learn to sort through interferes with her ability to thrive and remain competitive in the environment. So the environmental issues for African-American women would include competing socially, economically, mentally, etc.

Those of us who study race and gender dynamics in America understand this already but now its played itself out in a Darwinistic way.

Very interesting news.

2008 = Politics

2008-12-31T09:52:00.004-05:00

I have no doubt that these six people

dominated your conversations this year.

Have you added CNN to your TV favorites yet?

Daddy's Girls Excerpt

2008-12-30T20:01:00.006-05:00

MTV is debuting another reality show: Daddy's Girls. I am a sucker for the Hills but I am really excited about seeing positive images of African-American women on television. I was very proud to see MTV approve Run's House and this spin-off is like icing on the cake!

Sorry "New York" but these women are entrepreneurs and true role models for young women America, especially women of color.

Ok, so they are a little spoiled but it beats seeing episode after episode of profane language with half-naked women as if young women like Angela and Vanessa Simmons do not exist.

Thankful

2008-12-23T14:00:00.005-05:00

Thanksgiving goes beyond Thanksgiving Day.

This Holiday Season completes the end of one of the toughest years of our life. I hope you have expressed gratittude and thanks for everything you have. There will be many people waking up on Christmas morning with heavy hearts. Pray for your neighbors....and never stop giving thanks.

Green Eggs & Ham

2008-12-22T09:57:00.003-05:00

Since everyone knows that I spoil my sister, I thought I would share this recent news while shopping for Christmas gifts.

Although my sister loves everything Disney/Dora, I decided this Christmas that I would buck the system of buying Disney/Dora and attempt to share classic gifts. While shopping for classic books, I decided to pick up Dr. Seuss' Green Eggs & Ham amongst other books I knew she did not own. Of course before going to Barnes & Noble, I decided to look online for the cheapest prices.

When I got to Amazon.com I was floored by this review of Green Eggs & Ham when I read this:

"If you're searching for a literary example of peer pressure, look no further than Dr. Seuss's subtly horrifying "Green Eggs and Ham." The "hero" of this tale, Sam-I-Am, spends the entirety of the book trying to force green eggs and ham upon a nameless skeptic. The "villain" turns down the offer several times, but Sam-I-Am persists, going so far as to follow him home in order to make him try the green eggs and ham. He uses several textbook methods of peer pressure, including the famous, "You'll never know that you don't like it if you don't try it." He refuses to respect the man's right to say no, and badgers him incessantly until he caves under the pressure.

What disgusts me most about the end of the story is that once the man tries the green eggs and ham, he loves them and is simply another addition to a pool of addicts. Dr. Seuss's tragic allegory for the rising drug use among young people that plagued his time period is brilliant, but certainly not appropriate for young children. Sam-I-Am is too easily twisted to become a hero, opening the antagonist's mind to new things, rather than a metaphor for Satan as I believe was originally intended.

In conclusion, do not read this book to your children unless you are willing to explain to them that people like Sam-I-Am should be avoided at all costs, and that they should never follow the path of the story's antagonist. "

Wow. I have no words at this moment.

Barbie vs. Bratz

2008-12-17T09:43:00.005-05:00

In case you have not heard the news from Toy Departments across America, the Bratz dolls will be leaving the shelves very soon. Apparently, Mattel (the maker of Barbie) filed a law suit claiming that the creater of Bratz came up with the idea while working for Mattel.

Although I am not a parent, I have a five year old sister who plays with dolls. This Christmas I refuse to purchase anything Barbie or Hannah Montana. This is a decision for parents to ultimately make, but as an adult with a very young sister I have concerns too.

I am concerned about the number of decades the image of Barbie has dominated the toy aisle! Forget how the ethnic Barbies are never named Barbie. Forget the unrealistic body, the blonde hair, the companion Ken doll, the various Professions, and the material items Barbie accumulates....

Images like the Barbie Doll contributes to the inferiority complex minority girls spend their adult years trying to defeat.

Bratz is a legitimate competitor. For once we have dolls on the shelves that emphasize non-European physical features. The arguments most people have about the Bratz dolls include the Urban wear and physical features. I think most of the physical features are a reflection of non-European women. Sure the clothes could be a bit more modest, but Barbie too has her share of interesting fashions too. In the end, I advocate for Bratz because of the diversity and the proximity to real features of ethnic women.

What I will miss about the Bratz dolls:

1. The Lips

2. Their shapes--Barbie eat your heart out!

3. Their names (there is a Sasha in the group ode to Sasha Obama living in the White House)

4. Their Diversity

I really think that people are upset about Barbie finally having competition. The Bratz dolls are more of a reality than Barbie for lots of girls in my family. The Bratz phenomenon is about someone finally getting the message that there are girls of different shades around the world that cannot relate to Barbie. Unfortunately, too many Americans consider Barbie a classic and shy away at any real diversity in the doll world.

Bittersweet Caroline

2008-12-16T11:08:00.004-05:00

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose

By any other name would smell as sweet."

--Romeo & Juliet (II, ii, 1-2).

After conversations with friends, reading my favorite blogs, and tracking the story in the NYT & CNN, I find Caroline Kennedy's bid for the U.S. Senate bittersweet. I love her support and commitment to public service, but honestly believe that her name positions her to be the new Senator from NY. Its amazing to see so many changes in politics. Yet, this example shows that as "the more things change, the more they stay the same."

Barack Obama = two steps forward

Caroline Kennedy = two steps back

The Black and Missing: The East Charlotte Murders

2008-12-12T11:08:00.005-05:00

After posting Caylee Anthony's picture on my blog yesterday, I let curiosity get the best of me. I wandered through Google and many random websites to find pictures and/or stories of missing African-American woman and children. Needless to say, I was completely moved by many stories that never make it to Nancy Grace or other prime-time television programs.

The most striking story of all was about the serial killer Henry Louis Wallace.

Mr. Wallace was a young black man born in South Carolina that went on a killing spree in the early 90s in East Charlotte, NC. He managed to kill over 10 young Black women, all under 25 years old. As I read the trial transcript, read the memorial websites for each of the victims, and read the commentary from websites like TruTV---I grew angry. One of the victim's mother mentioned how this man managed to kill so many women without interruption from the police: they were black and working class.

Undoubtedly, after reading the court transcripts I had difficulty getting to bed. I was horrified that this happened in my life time and I never heard the story. As my night went on, I was really anxious and upset over the details that I'd poured over. Naturally as I counselor I thought about the psychology behind the story and put a lot of time into trying to figure this guy out. At the end of the night/morning, I was exhausted and afraid that I cared too much about the case. This case had such an impact on me because these women have many similarities to me--young, black, with working-class roots.

I could go on and on about this case forever, but I decided to share this blog because I want to give voice to those who we never hear or see on television. It is a shame to know that if you are not white and are not part of the middle class, your tragedy may never be shared to assist in search for missing loved ones or their kidnappers/murderers.

So today, I want to recognize the victims of Mr. Wallace. They were:

Tashanda Bethea
Sharon Lavette Nance
Caroline Love
Shawna D. Hawk
Audrey Ann Spain
Valencia M. Jumper
Michelle Stinson
Vanessa Little Mack
Betty Jean Baucum
Brandi June Henderson
Deborah Slaughter

Please visit You Tube to watch the various memorial videos: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eg9I8qLEdhM

Please pray for their families.

Caylee Anthony

2008-12-11T11:49:00.003-05:00

WFTV News in Orlando reports this morning of a Young Child found near the family's home. Keep this family and all the families with missing Children in your prayers.

Peace.

The Inauguration Ball

2008-12-09T15:38:00.003-05:00

So apparently the Political Fashionistas of America are trying to decide what Mrs. Obama should wear to the Inauguration Ball. Visit this site to see the sketches.

I kind of like this Michael Kors sketch....but then the Peter Som "Winter White" is nice too.. but I'll let you decide.

O.J....

2008-12-05T14:06:00.003-05:00

I could not remain silent.

The latest on O. J. Simpson annoys me to no end! This man could never receive a fair trial in this country after the 1995 acquittal. No matter your position on him...trust and believe that.

Mrs. Obama's White House

2008-11-25T13:57:00.010-05:00

Jolene Ivey's commentary on Michelle Obama's future life in the White House brought back images, discussions, and movies that captured the essence of the "Mammy" caricatures that managed to dominate the representation of Black women in the media. In her commentary, Ivey says, "From the time when Africans were dragged to these shores as slaves, one of the jobs that fell to these women who weren't working in the fields was caring for the children of their owners" and even after slavery, "it was common for black women to leave their own children at home to fend for themselves and go to work for low wages as domestics in the homes of well-off white families."

Ivey clearly brings to mind characters like "Mammy" in Gone with the Wind, "Aunt Jemina" on the Pancake box, "Lucrezia Borgia" in the film Mandingo, and "Annie Johnson" in Imitation of Life. I like to think how often these characters and other real women of color had to anticipate the mood of their employers/masters in order to keep the peace. Do you not recall that Mammy knew exactly what to say to keep people in the home happy? Sometimes she placated her owner's moods with food or kind words. Do you remember the sacrifices these women made and how they always helped things come together?

Michelle Obama is intelligent, progressive, caring, and nuturing. I would argue that Mammy, Aunt Jemina, Lucrezia Borgia, and Annie Johnson were too. These women created a tradition in the Black community of making a way out of no way. In many ways, Michelle Obama makes change happen out of no way too.

Ivey beams with excitment about Mrs. Obama's future life in the White House because it resonates with her own privileged background as a woman of color. Although Mrs. Obama's experience will be one of privilege, the fundamental drive to succeed that comes from within Mrs. Obama is something that she shares with her foremothers. Just as the Mammy, Mrs. Obama will have to nuture the wounds of others' children. She will have to anticipate potential problems and respond in a thought provoking manner. As much as Ivey appears giddy over the thought of Mrs. Obama's ability to be Black, educated, and at home with the children, the truth is that in so many ways the American public is her new baby. Although Barack will be the President, Mrs. Obama will become the First Lady, a role with its own set of spoken and unspoken responsibilities.

But I am more excited about Mrs. Obama's image in the White House defying the negative images of the Mammy caricatures. For once, we will witness healthy images of Black women. We will witness the truth of a Black Woman's ability to be loving, smart, sexy, fun, beautiful, strong, independent, beautiful, fashionable, honest, attentive, driven, and happy.

The Black woman's allegiance to her community has been expensive--overworked, underpaid, inconsiderate male counterparts, health concerns, media scrutiny, legal lynching of her children, and a scapegoat for both community and institutional problems.

Mrs. Obama is a refreshing outlook for the future.

Meeting President-Elect Obama Halfway

2008-11-25T09:10:00.007-05:00

Now that the 2008 Election season has passed, I am challenging all of you to meet President-Elect Barack Obama half way. On election night Barack Obama said he needed each of us to assist him in making change happen in America. I believe one of the most important ways of making change possible is by actively participating in the lives of children.

We have all heard the alarming statistics measuring the success rate of children living in both urban and rural America. Billions of donations have been made for many years to aid neighborhoods in crime prevention, educational, and life enrichment programs for these children. Yet, far too often we find that many of America's youth continue the family cycle of drug use, involvement in crime and incarceration, teenage pregnancy, etc.

My challenge to you is to be more active in your community.

Although non-profits love receiving your donation dollars, especially in these difficult economic times, the value of pairing up with someone who could benefit from your experience goes beyond words. Community mentors are pivotal in communities that continue to see high crime rates and poor education programs.

I have been a community mentor since my Senior year in High School. That's right. I was a part of programs on campus that catered to Elementary aged students, including reading programs and drug education programs that visited area schools. My involvement in youth programs continued while working with organizations like the Salvation Army, and even now a program out of Atlanta called Fifteen. I am committed to making sure that my success is not in vain.

See my mentee's story on Essential 2 Life's Website.

This is just merely one example of meeting President-Elect Obama half way.

I know plenty of family members who assist other children in the family on different needs. Sometimes helping those really close to you is an easier way to transition in to being actively involved in the lives of others. So if mentoring a "random" child/teenager in the neighborhood does not sit well with you, perhaps helping another family member could be sufficient. And by the way, this does not necessarily translate into loaning people money. I am more concerned with loaning time and fellowship.

There are numerous ways to get involved with your community, contact the local community organizations in your area to find in what ways your talents/experiences could better assist your neighbors.

Peace

"It's kind of fun to do the impossible."

2008-11-04T10:15:00.001-05:00

All of this means....

That it is ok to live in this skin I'm in.

I can walk down the street with my head a little higher.

Having an amazing example of a Black Family, Black Manhood, Black Womanhood, and Black Girlhood on the national scene....

As much as his Presidency would be about the people and our quest for change, it will be about Black people and our ability to persevere and somehow move forward despite adversity.

This election is so racial for me because for years we've been bombarded with negative images of our Brothers and Sisters and this is the ultimate redemption of all of those images.

A part of me wants to wrap him up and keep him to myself for the "Black Community", but I am just too proud and cannot wait to share him with the rest of the world.

He will not be just the Black President, but the President of the United States of America.

No matter the outcome of this election: NOTHING will bring me down today.

Obama in Prime Time

2008-10-29T12:14:00.010-04:00

Tonight Americans will have the opportunity to see Barack Obama make his case to the country through a prime time television special. There are several media outlets describing his air-time as excessive and suggests that Obama is flaunting--in other words being "uppity." All of these comments are absolutely ridiculous. We all know what usually comes after "uppity" among certain groups in this country. I believe these people are upset over this self-made Black man!

Some of my fellow Americans are upset that Obama has managed to organize a campaign better than the GOP. The truth is that John McCain's sloppy campaign is finally facing the reality of how defeat may feel if he is not able to change voters' minds about his ability to lead the country. Although John McCain still has a chance to win this election, the Obama campaign's ability to buy air-time shows a reflection of impecable marketing, fundraising, and organizational skills.

The McCain campaign simply was not ready for someone like Barack Obama.

Everytime a Black person approaches the brink of success, someone is always there to tarnish their image by labeling him or her as "uppity" and suggest that he/she is out of place. Barack Obama is proving to the American people that our potential and "place" in America is wherever you want it to be, provided you have the courage, strength, skill, and right message.

The significance of the Obama Campaign's ability to buy 30 minutes of television is huge. Americans have witnessed numerous years of air-time devoted to reiterating the status quo and portraying stereotypical images of minorities. But for once, a prominent minority will have 30 minutes to show the American audience an amazing example of a Black person with a positive message. If the American audience tunes in to the networks as expected, millions will see Obama challenge every inferior image of Black people that has dominated the American networks since the invention of television.

Flavor Flav eat your heart out!

Hudson Family

2008-10-27T09:44:00.004-04:00

Please pray for Jennifer Hudson and her family as they grieve.

"And we know all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

Michelle Obama and the First Lady Appeal

2008-10-23T10:42:00.010-04:00

CNN's Campbell Brown committed on the Politico.com reports that the Republican National Committee spent more than $150,000 on clothes, hair and make-up for Sarah Palin on the campaign trail. I pretty much agree with everything that Brown brings to the forefront--especially the double standards.

However, can you image how different the story would be if Michelle Obama spent similar amounts of money while campaigning for Barack Obama? Rush Limbaugh, Fox News, and others could not get enough of it. Michelle Obama not only has the pressure of being a woman in politics, but also a Black woman with the potential of being First Lady. She has to be modest in spending to not only be "considerate" of donors but also avoid the "golddigger" stereotype and show off the "white first lady look." Yes, I said it.

Unfortunately, the image of the First Lady is extremely important to many Americans. Women like former First Lady Jackie Kennedy played the part extremely well and challenged succeeding First Ladies to up the ante. Yet, even Mrs. Kennedy was not excluded from criticism as she wore clothing from International designers. But, Michelle Obama's problems with having to appeal to the American people extends far beyond the issues that Palin and Kennedy experienced with scrutiny from men and women about hair and clothing.

Another layer of issues for Mrs. Obama is having to wade through the historical problems black women experience with appearance. Can you image if pictures surfaced on the web and on news networks with Mrs. Obama wearing cornrows or having braids while on vacation? Don Imus would have a party. So, Michelle Obama must wear the Pearls, keep the mane tamed with the edges straight, and spend within reason.

Whew...and we have not touched on other components of presentation.

Peace.

Obama/Biden '08

America's State of Mind

2008-10-22T13:31:00.007-04:00

As a counselor with a National EAP company, I have the unfortunate opportunity to witness the struggles of everyday Americans. The purpose of the Employee Assistance Program provided by many employers is to assist employees on striking a balance between work and life-related issues. The bulk of the work with EAP companies centers around providing short-term counseling for a wide-range of issues--including work problems, substance abuse, stress, marital and family concerns. In addition to the counseling offered, we work with other national companies to help employees with legal issues, financial matters, childcare referrals, and eldercare resources. Needless to say, we hear it all.

With this current financial crisis, our calls from clients are becoming more severe. Most of the clients we serve are college educated homeowners with families. It is safe for me to say that most of their upbringing did not prepare them for these times. Many of our clients have a church and attend more often than not.

Despite all that, these American families are in disarray at this very moment. The workplace has become a war zone in buildings where employees once thrived and contributed daily. However, these same buildings now evoke fear in the heart of every employee, including the veterans. The pressure of performing well at all times has become a bit too much. The pressure of wondering if you will be asked to pack your belongings and not return is daunting. The pressure of worrying about the grant or loan needed to keep the organization/business operating drives employees amuck. All these things leave my clients more distracted, annoyed, paranoid, and anxious. And God forbid someone gets sick.

Even more---they bring these emotions home. Undoubtedly, their spouses (if they have a spouse) shuffle home the same way. Do they open the bills they never have the money to pay? Do they turn on the television to hear both Barack Obama and John McCain exchange words? Do they pay attention to their kids, especially the one that has been falling behind in math class?

Probably not.

Most of my clients are overwhelmed and afraid. They have family members they consider to be "ungratful." They have spouses that cheat, hide money, gamble with the rent/mortgage payment, go straight to happy hour after work, or simply leave the house and never return.

Increasingly, I receive requests for counseling from Black folk. And not just the city folk, but those who live in the rural parts of Georgia. These are the same families that would have never sought counseling 10-15 years ago. Now they do not ask for counseling, but just want someone to talk to about their "nerves." I am happy that these overwhelmed heroines are in a place where they feel comfortable seeking help.

Black men are not far behind.

I am reminded of my pastor's favorite saying: God is neither dumb, deaf, nor blind.

What do Christians do when they are stuck between a rock and hard place (e.g., pharoah's army and the Red Sea)? Pray. Have faith. The battle is not yours...

Encourage those around you to seek help if they need it.

Please share the resources on my page with anyone you know that may be going through a difficult time with the economy. As I have time, I will add more resources.

Peace.

Barack Obama: Another American Story

2008-10-17T12:07:00.019-04:00

No matter the outcome of this 2008 Election season, the story of Barack Obama will go down in history. The promise that Obama brings to Americans will have a lasting impact on generations to come--including yours. We have all witnessed the rise of an educated self-made man of color. Throughout all of the negative campaigning and rigorous screenings, Barack Obama defies all the odds set before him at birth.

So the question is: What will you tell your children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren about Barack Obama?

How much of your discussion will focus on his roots: mixed ancestry, working class background, single parent/grandparents upbringing, absent father.

As much as I want to make sure that the history books get his story "right", most of my story about Obama will focus on the process to which he became the man that we love and admire at this very moment. I will be anxious to talk about his intelligence, determination, optimism, candor, down-to-earth personality, strategy, competitive spirit, bottom up perspective, faith, and commitment to family. I cannot wait to talk about his demeanor during uncertain times, like the infamous metaphor of the swan gliding across the pond.

It will be important for me mention how he confronted the issue of race head-on with an amazing speech that pressured all Americans to consider their contradictions. My story would be incomplete without the details of how he faced his opponent--an American war hero who was completely out of touch. I will be sure to mention how far too often the McCain campaign got it "wrong." I would include the arguments about Ayers, Acorn, Taxes, Joe the Plummer, the "suspension" of McCain's Campaign, and McCain's choosing Sarah Palin.

This story will go down in history much like David & Goliath.

The children and grandchildren will be fascinated, but most importantly, they will live to tell their children and the legacy will continue.

We should consider ourselves privileged to be alive in these moments.

I hope you, too, will vote Obama/Biden on Nov. 4, 2008.